See in my hood….

by RoachKiller

We have the moms who are so tired they fall asleep in there cars at Fred meyers! The usual white trash who puts massive door dents in your car with a whole 4500 miles on it!

Then, then you got the little dick yuppies with the 40’ long ford f 150’s who pull into a compact parking spot! Hanging 20 feet out of the spot! Ofcourse with the trailer hitch that extends another 10 fucking feet.

All so they can show everyone exactly how small their dicks are! How over compensation is definitely a thing with yuppies and there trucks…..

Oh you didn’t hear…..

by RoachKiller

My water bill is literally $5 a month with a $22 service fee! 🙂 I have about $250,000 in a retirement fund I can’t touch until I’m 63. As I set up all my retirement funds, untouchable! Makes you come up with creative new ways for emergency money!

My brother refuses to answer my texts or calls about this bookshelf he wants.

I no longer have to take my cans and bottles back in person and I am headed out to buy uncooked shrimp and black beans to use in tonight’s fish burritos!

Most of all my futaba shirt fits again! Bwoop bwoop!

Oh hell yea

by RoachKiller

Twas good food! like always, ya snooze ya loose you fucking low rent quacks…..

The mango pico de gallo and super fresh Romain heart lettuce made those tacos! Damn, I think I’ll do the burrito left overs today!

Oh and my bad! I used a fresh Brie cheese on the tacos….. not blue cheese!

Oh and…..

by RoachKiller

Ladies and gents! That there is $85 food bill! Which includes $13.00 of fresh dog food! If you shop reasonable you can find killer deals!

Oh and $12 worth of lobster tails and a $9 wedge of fresh blue cheese! 12 – 2 liters of diet soda pop for $15, not to mention the 2 nice petite sirloins in there somewhere for like $7

I’m gunna eat like a fucking king for a week or so…..

Yall will be…..

by RoachKiller

Happy to know I found someone who could actually give me an answer to some questions I had about autism and adhd sufferers!

I arrived to deliver like an hour earlier than the usual guy! When he came out of the cooler he had that look!

The same look crissy has when she is standing at the smoothie machines at quick trip! I actually smiled! I’m like I know that look! He is autistic!

Lo and behold he was! So I asked him how he is dealing with that at work?

His exact reply was, “ he had to retrain his thinking! It takes him a few extra moments to compose himself. Yet shortly there after he will make a decision! Whether it’s the right decision or not. It really doesn’t matter! He made a quick decision and moves on!

He said sometimes he will even go back and relook at a situation and change his decision! But he always makes a decision!

He told me a couple other things but the main part was the retraining his thinking! A lot like a dyslexic has to retrain there’s…..

Interesting…..

If you…..

by RoachKiller

Don’t mind folding a few clothes I’ll gladly feed you! Tonight I’m having a salad with cod and butterfly shrimp tacos……

If you’re nice and smell good. I might even have a taste of your taco…

Oh pookie, I ain’t talking about or to my ex…..

I don’t know…..

by RoachKiller

Lady, I’m thinking polyester fluorescent safety green really doesn’t bring out my blue eyes like you say!

But thanks for the compliment…..

I evar…..

by RoachKiller

Tell you why I keep my wallet in any pocket other than a back pocket?

I was in Nashville at a checkout. Waiting to buy lunch. Hands full etc…..

As I’m standing there this bitch just slams into me right? All while feeling a hand grabbing my ass! I was like hey, say scuse me next time you fucking wanker!

Her and her cohort ran fast outta there!

At the time I was driving a truck with a piece of shit seat. So I kept my wallet cause it was really fucking thick with truck stuff cards. I kept it on my back in my waistband…..

So other than the fact, she copped a free feel she didn’t get shit!

So now you know, the reason why I keep my wallet in any other pocket besides my back pocket…..

Hun…..

by RoachKiller

Like a pick pocketer, make sure your mark isn’t already scanning for the same thing you’re trying to steal from him!

I would also recommend upgrading the soft on your rfid scanner! That shit was pathetic…

My guess….

by RoachKiller

The reason I’m still sitting here at the dc is?

1- I sharted and I’m waiting for my clothes to dry?

2- I’m crying from spilled milk?

3- the trailer I was loaded on had two brake lines leaking air and no lower marker lights on the left side?

If you guessed #3 you are correct…..

Unlike yesterday’s trailer that the lift would randomly leave me dead in the water…..

I don’t see….

by RoachKiller

The writing on the wall! I do however see the blood stains from where your face was…..

Keep fucking with me and you will get to see that wall first hand again….