Author: RoachKiller

I seem

by RoachKiller

To obviously be confused! I got to the casino at noon. They proceeded to tell me that I was there two hours earlier than the regular guy. So I’m confused as to how I’m going to slow?

Please enlighten me……

I wouldn’t…..

by RoachKiller

Be so concerned with what size shoe I wear! If I were you, I would be more concerned with how big my balls are……

Cus from what I’m seeing so far, yours haven’t even dropped yet…..

And you are like what? In your 50’s-60’s…..

Omg…..

by RoachKiller

I’m guessing the antibiotics are working! As I literally have snot globing everywhere! This means the sinus infection is wayning and maybe I can finally get the tooth pulled that’s causing the issue!

Doesn’t every single person walk there dog before they go to work? Looser…..

Ok asking….

by RoachKiller

If a woman is giving you a handy and says, “ omg I have never seen so much cum! “ is that a good thing or a bad thing?

Asking for a friend……

You know…..

by RoachKiller

What’s cool about driving a day cab? I got windows in the back to watch when I hit shit! Far better view than in my mirrors!

What are you……

by RoachKiller

Fucking talking about you, moron? I’m having a fucking blast every day at work. But I also know I’m fucking tired of being abused for shit. I have no control of…

Yes, the pasta salad and new seasons you’re welcome……

Yeah, I was just thinking dude. Every time I see you all I see is a fish floundering! Gasping for air, trying to hold onto something that you never had……

Well, that you’re just a fucking idiot!

Hang tight….

by RoachKiller

I found some of my daughter’s coloring books and crayons! I’ll bring them up to the drivers lounge latter. That way all you little boys and girls have something productive to do……

Cus listening to you talk is like listening to retards sing…..

I often wonder…..

by RoachKiller

Do stupid people know they are stupid? Or do they walk through life thinking they are geniuses?

Go sit at a drivers lounge either at work or a random truck stop. Then proceed to find out if I’m telling the truths or not!

But hey, what do I know? Well other than the fact you’re a fucking Moron……

Actually….

by RoachKiller

What I’m thinking about doing is “ accidentally “ leaving my lift and my hand truck behind every fucking time I have a customer bitch at me and tell me I’m late!

No I’m not late. I follow the list of deliveries and move along at a decent pace. I’m sorry if they changed the routes and bumped you from first in the morning. To the second to the last stop! In the afternoon!

I’m just the driver!!! If you have an issue, please get off your ass and contact your sales person!

I have no control over if the paperwork is in my hands on time OR if the truck batteries are in working order!

I’m sorry for your frustration! I have zero.zero control over any of that shit! No I will not reload the truck at the dc to do your stop first!

If that’s an issue, please contact your sales rep! I just drive the fucking truck! My speed is set by how “fat” each pallet is I have to break down!

The fatter the pallet, the longer it takes….

I am also not a b class straight truck! I don’t haul 7,000lbs of fruit and veggies! I’m a class A truck I average 17,000 to 25,000lbs of your fruit and veggies!

What’s the moral of the fucking story? I’m tired of being chewed out by customer over shit I have no control! Comprende’? Mother fuckers…..

I am not the mother fucking complaint line!

You ready…..

by RoachKiller

To go princess? Or are you to busy with your nonsensical bullshit…..

Everything that’s come out of your B class mouth as a crock of shit…..

You’re pissed cause I fucked your mom aren’t you?

So if a…..

by RoachKiller

Woman asks “ what’s your dick like? While you’re on a date! Do you think your gunna get laid?

Asking for a friend…..

Another day of…..

by RoachKiller

Door! Corner! Cooler! Corner! Door! Door! Cooler!

Everything you have to exclaim as your going in, out or around!

It’s kind of kitchen safety and it’s also kind of to help the people with disabilities….. honestly it’s actually kind of fun! 🙂

Went out….

by RoachKiller

Today to visit family at the cemetery. Oddly realizing that a lot like Willamette national. I have family in every corner and the parts in between!

That was a tough one! The mariachi band playing in the background. Grown men tearing up! Twas a tough thing to see!

Yet it also allowed me some freedom! Mom passed at the beginning of the pandemic. All those people were dying, from places I had recently been to.

I was too nervous to come in off the road. As who knows if I had it or not! ( ended up getting it twice during the pandemic. The show that it was! )

But she passed during that time! I always felt guilty for not coming home. Finally after five years I was able to let that guilt go! So freeing it definetly was!

Of course left some flowers at a couple family graves. Atleast the ones I could find. Made the mistake of taking Mika. Ofcourse she pooped on a little kids grave! 🙂

Out of respect for whoever put the artificial flowers in the urn. I left them and just added my dozen roses!

Luckily her good sons 😉 were tall! Peace out and happy Mother’s Day!

P.s. has science yet figured out what exactly is in ambrosia salad? That was mom’s fav family gathering desert?

Time to…..

by RoachKiller

Go take mom some flowers and get the shit I need for dinner…..

Happy Mother’s Day to those who gave’th birth’eth

She gets a treat today even though she can never have children! ;(

My guess….

by RoachKiller

Somebody owes me a fucking beer for this! Truck started!

The reason they threw this pallet on. Obviously intended for another truck. My guess would be that looked like way too much work for the princess…..

But then when I’m making money, cus you Can throw all that shit at me. they get even more madder! It’s like stupid is as stupid does…..

Welp an hour late start and once again my truck has a dead battery…..

Don’t ask me I’m not a mechanic nor am I giving a shit…..

***** update!*****

I was just informed that a truck broke down yesterday. Missed a delivery and I’m doing it today! That I groove with! Even though that is a mother fucker of a pallet to roll up stairs! ***** end update *****

Ya know….

by RoachKiller

While you were busy being a worthless dooshbag. I was running through my head every conceivable outcome. Then deciding what actions I needed to take to make whatever moronic thing you just said work in my favor!

Trust me I’m not as nice a guy as you think…..