Category: Road Life

What Life on the road as a truck driver is really like!

Can you believe……

by RoachKiller

I have gone an entire month with no cruise control and stuck at 65 mph. Yeah I still kicked your motherfucking cockroached little ass up and down the highways and by ways of this here great nation of ours, merika!

Not to mention the fact that my drivewayz just randomly goes down on a daily basis now.

Really starts to make you wonder about that conspiracy theory doesn’t it?

Yall really need to start praying to that sweet baby Jesus! He ain’t done me wrong yet. Just like hail Satan, he ain’t failed me yet either……

When a……

by RoachKiller

Simple exclamation point proves everything you just told your attorney!

That’s when you know, it’s gonna be a decent day!

See driver……

by RoachKiller

This is where your low IQ and mental retardation becomes quite evident!

Dispatch sends me a load. I have zero control over what load they send me. I only have control over whether I say yes and take the load or no and turn the load down.

So the fact you’re running around stating I stole your preplan. Is the biggest crock of shit anyone will ever say!

And I’ll repeat for you. I have no control over what load they send me.! so my recommendation is you shut your fucking hole and mind your own fucking business, Comprende’?

Nothing pisses off……

by RoachKiller

The company cockroaches as when I get a publicly announced award! Actually, it’s rather touching! They think of me enough that it actually bothers them that I get an award.!

Imagine that a nobody like me as they keep telling me. A person who’s not qualified enough to work for this company like me gets an award!

Talk about fucking crazy the fact it bothers you I get an award? yeah that sends warm tingles through my belly…..

Only problem is I have no idea who the fuck you are!

The only thing I do know is talking to you is like talking to the security guard from this this morning! After 510 minutes, I had to tell her all I wanna do is drop this trailer and go……

You ready to go…

by RoachKiller

Or are you too busy praising the Lord?? My guess you’ve been praising the Lord this whole time? Yet you are still in the same spot you were when you started praying.

So I guess maybe you should stop praying and get your fucking ass to work you little pile of rat shit!

All hail Jesus Christ superstar…..

Ready to roll hobo Joe…..

by RoachKiller

After checking your work. I believe you will receive a D+!

As this isn’t how you should have dropped the trailer!

FYI, you are aware that the hoses don’t have to be hooked up right? As long as the valves are not leaking and or the tire. You can roll on…..

Sometimes if I’m in a sensitive state. I will put tape over the missing valves of caps aren’t available…..

Wanna talk about……

by RoachKiller

Funny? We just finished album number two. We need artwork for the cover. I have all sorts of religious trinkets and skulls and all sorts of shit like that, that would look great on the cover of an album

So I ordered a few religious things off of Amazon. Just some cheap trinkets that will accentuate the project I’m working on.

Well, they were delivered a couple of days ago and I thought it was weird that last night I opened up my social media app and everything was about Catholicism.

Now my social media phone, and my Amazon phone are two separate things. I never talked out loud about what I was looking for on Amazon. I never talked out loud about what I bought on Amazon.

So it’s really strange how I buy a couple of catholic trinkets and the next thing you know my entire social media feed is all about Catholics.

Coincidence or conspiracy?

Oh those bastards…..

by RoachKiller

At the tsa, they alert me that my finger print results are in yet the website is down to check!

Now I know I’m clean, have been the last 3 times I went in and got fingerprinted!

It’s the fact they won’t let me check! Bastards!