Category: Weather

Oh so you want…..

by RoachKiller

To know what Houston is like right now? The highway is slushy for the most part! They are NOT deicing the bridges! Big, long, small, short, they are being left as is and they are slick as fuck!

Surface roads are slush, other than that driving through Houston is like driving through a big town on Xmas day…..

Oh and everything, and I mean everything is closed!

P.s. as of typing this it has begun snowing again! Very lightly but yes it’s snowing! Temp is 30°’s and maintaining!

This is what it looked like into Conroe from the rest area at the 124 on I-45…..

Like Xmas morning, awwww! Or the day after a hurricane…. Awwwww

This years frozen……

by RoachKiller

Windshield wiper fluid reservoir fix!

this one was a motherfucker! The washer fluid froze somewhere down there in New Mexico when it was -8°. So I did my ritual throw in a little bit of rubbing alcohol and that should be that.

No, It didn’t do a fucking thing! So to remedy this, I had to stop and buy 2 pint size bottles or quart size bottles of rubbing alcohol from Wally world. A new gallon of off the shelf washer fluid. And a gallon of 2020 mixed with water and a small hint of antifreeze, small drip.

So I had to pour a full quart of rubbing alcohol into the fresh bottle of washer fluid. A Drop of antifreeze with alcohol into the gallon of water in 2020.

Now, finally after almost a week of no washer fluid, I finally have a fucking washer fluid!

Praise, sweet baby Jesus…..

PS to you drivers going the other way. Yes that is ice all over the side of this trailer and snow all over the back of the trailer and the white stuff on the tractor is left over from when I ran over that meth dealer couple weeks ago…..

What did I tell you……

by RoachKiller

I told you I was fucking psychic, and I was going to prove it to you when we hit Wyoming!

Did I not say, “ we will see at least one Amazon truck in the ditch somewhere between Rawlings and Cheyenne?”

Told you I was fucking psychic! That’s number two first one was on elk second one was right before Sinclair!

Ha, I win now fuck off!

How to keep…..

by RoachKiller

Your truck from jackknifing!

I have found the easiest way to keep my truck from jackknifing it’s simple. Is by not putting myself in a situation where my truck could possibly jackknife!

And if I am in a situation where I have to keep driving, I slow, way the fuck down and use extreme caution…..

Duh!

Most of all if it’s a situation where I just gotta keep going to get to a place to park.

You know one of those butthole puckering rides.

I’ve been known to pull off, slap on a set of single rails, maybe a drag chain or two and get on down the road!

The greatest thing……

by RoachKiller

I heard on the news today. Was a guy say come on out the roads are great. There’s nothing out here to hit! cause I’m the only moron on the road.!

That made me laugh so hard……

Driver your fucked…..

by RoachKiller

You and your boyfriend never should have stopped in Seville! Another 5 miles and you were clear all the way down!

I’m not making fun of your sexuality! I’m just trying to help you see. Everyone already knows you’re a gay trainer!

Now you’re also fucked as that snow was coming down hard and the fact it’s now below 20 degrees. Also means all this shit is ice now!

Now you and your friend have plenty of time to switch positions! Top, bottom, bottom, top…..

Remember to wear a condom!

I have really…..

by RoachKiller

Got to stop putting these bad boys on right after a shower!

Warm as fuck!

Don’t worry, the low iq’ers will say they are yoga pants! lol, no they are men’s thermal running pants or tights!

Nothing female or gay about them! Considering my buddy who wore the cold version of these over in Iraq during the war……