What Life on the road as a truck driver is really like!
by RoachKiller It’s true! There is this place I go to that all the females that work there have that ass! Ass’s that make a grown man cry!
I cried, I cried hard! There is one ass in particular that is worthy of worship! Praise sweet baby Jesus!
I would bow to that ass any day! 😉 woo doggies!
by RoachKiller For lunch when you deliver to a lot of health food stores! Grrrr! Actually the vegan blueberry muffins are pretty good!
Most these dudes that work at them are gay. So there is not much hostility about…..
Although I’m not gay, it’s still quite the fun! Especially when you get that one who thinks you’re cute! 🙂
by RoachKiller My leg is so sore today! ROFLMAO!
Ladies yall lied! Tattoos really do hurt…..
by RoachKiller Bus go round and round, round and round……
by RoachKiller Haven’t found that 2nd gigabit of bandwidth I have on my network have you? ROFLMAO!
Anyhoot my trolls are back in action again. You should hear the voicemail the last cockroach left yesterday! it’s getting old and that really was a stupid fucking move!
Anyhoots, it’s Friday I’m stone cold tired and I woke up later than usual this morning and put on my dirty, “ exploding rancid watermelon “ shorts this morning in my rush!
All day everyone has been asking, “ why does it smell like a rotting potato?”
I keep correcting them, “ no it’s actually a rotting watermelon! “
Loving this new Nash! My other one is a s-63 this new one is a s-57 and it is wicked hot!
I nic’ed her wicked bitch! ( yes after the black n blue song….
https://music.apple.com/us/album/wicked-bitch/1443545437?i=1443545715
This however is still my fav black n blue song!
by RoachKiller The bullying going driver?
by RoachKiller Be so jellyz of the privlaged information I scored today!
I now know the secret recipe of galaxy pizza! Ha!
by RoachKiller I just passed a motel sign that said “Welcome all, imaginary friends stay for free!”
Dude for you that’s like hitting the mother load! You and all your imaginary friends can get together and have a party and all stay in the same fucking room……
Book your reservations now!
by RoachKiller Am I fucking sore today! I’m thinking that the 1 hour of sleep I got yesterday wasn’t enough! Usually when I can’t sleep like that I am stressed about something!
Oddly if I am, I don’t know what’s stressing me out…..
All I know is I’m pretty sure yesterday was leg day! ROFLMAO!
Other than the watermelon bomb that exploded in the trailer! It was just a usual day! Twas a good day!
Call in the forensics team! That’s all that’s left of the explosive device! 🙂
by RoachKiller Sweet baby Jesus is real! $1.47 boxes of chocolate kashi!
Hell yea!
by RoachKiller We have the moms who are so tired they fall asleep in there cars at Fred meyers! The usual white trash who puts massive door dents in your car with a whole 4500 miles on it!
Then, then you got the little dick yuppies with the 40’ long ford f 150’s who pull into a compact parking spot! Hanging 20 feet out of the spot! Ofcourse with the trailer hitch that extends another 10 fucking feet.
All so they can show everyone exactly how small their dicks are! How over compensation is definitely a thing with yuppies and there trucks…..
by RoachKiller Ladies and gents! That there is $85 food bill! Which includes $13.00 of fresh dog food! If you shop reasonable you can find killer deals!
Oh and $12 worth of lobster tails and a $9 wedge of fresh blue cheese! 12 – 2 liters of diet soda pop for $15, not to mention the 2 nice petite sirloins in there somewhere for like $7
I’m gunna eat like a fucking king for a week or so…..
by RoachKiller Tonight’s dinner will be cod, butterfly shrimp and lobster tail tacos…..
Sorry for the confusion!
by RoachKiller Don’t mind folding a few clothes I’ll gladly feed you! Tonight I’m having a salad with cod and butterfly shrimp tacos……
If you’re nice and smell good. I might even have a taste of your taco…
Oh pookie, I ain’t talking about or to my ex…..
by RoachKiller Not one thing going back or extra!
by RoachKiller Lady, I’m thinking polyester fluorescent safety green really doesn’t bring out my blue eyes like you say!
But thanks for the compliment…..
by RoachKiller Tell you why I keep my wallet in any pocket other than a back pocket?
I was in Nashville at a checkout. Waiting to buy lunch. Hands full etc…..
As I’m standing there this bitch just slams into me right? All while feeling a hand grabbing my ass! I was like hey, say scuse me next time you fucking wanker!
Her and her cohort ran fast outta there!
At the time I was driving a truck with a piece of shit seat. So I kept my wallet cause it was really fucking thick with truck stuff cards. I kept it on my back in my waistband…..
So other than the fact, she copped a free feel she didn’t get shit!
So now you know, the reason why I keep my wallet in any other pocket besides my back pocket…..
by RoachKiller Like a pick pocketer, make sure your mark isn’t already scanning for the same thing you’re trying to steal from him!
I would also recommend upgrading the soft on your rfid scanner! That shit was pathetic…
by RoachKiller The reason I’m still sitting here at the dc is?
1- I sharted and I’m waiting for my clothes to dry?
2- I’m crying from spilled milk?
3- the trailer I was loaded on had two brake lines leaking air and no lower marker lights on the left side?
If you guessed #3 you are correct…..
Unlike yesterday’s trailer that the lift would randomly leave me dead in the water…..
by RoachKiller The writing on the wall! I do however see the blood stains from where your face was…..
Keep fucking with me and you will get to see that wall first hand again….