Category: Road Life

What Life on the road as a truck driver is really like!

Speak up…..

by RoachKiller

We in the parking lot can’t hear you! Something about “ you think you have this all figured out?”

We all want to know how that turned out for ya! Then we all want to know who the fuck you’re talking to…..

Amazing the shit you hear stupid people say, really loudly…..

Luckily they have the exact same frames as I bought 3 years ago…..

In the 3 years I’ve owned these they have saved my eyeballs twice from flying metal and burrs hanging off trailers…..

Not to mention luck! That’s what saved me from that flying brake can that flew past my head at the truck stop…..

Yea it was at a pilot in Wisconsin! I was walking g in to shower and a spread axle drove by. Hit a pothole and his brake can blew off! You know that sound effect in like in final destination? You hear it when something is fly to kill people! Yea that noise is true life…..

I’m wondering…..

by RoachKiller

If the x wife will be able to buy everyone’s love this year with mass quantities of presents?

Me, everyone got 1 decent present! If it’s not good enough for ya! We’ll then return it and fuck off!

That’s probably why you didn’t get anything from me this year, huh?

( If you need a mower I found this on the neighbors corner this morning at 05:00 when I took the garbage out thinking it was Thursday….. )

I call it…..

by RoachKiller

The hail satan grift wrap set!

It looks great as long as you don’t look at it from any side view! 😉 hey in my defense I never said I could wrap……

Unfortunately I have no idea how to spell any of there names! Hell most of them I can’t even remember there names!

I’m a face guy…..

Eww that ruffled…..

by RoachKiller

Some feathers! Lately I’ve been getting complaints from customers! I haven’t a clue as to who the fuck to tell them to contact!

So today, using my most recent experiences as examples. I asked the night guy!

Now I’m not a pussy! If I’m saying it to the night boss. I have no problems saying it to the accused!

Like I did tonight! Yet by doing this it really seams to have ruffled some feathers! Honestly wasn’t trying to. I was literally trying to find out the info!

Cua these customers look at me like I have any power to help!

FYI, I don’t…..

Still having a blast! Got a new regular route. That one starts at the end of the week!

Yes, I’m still having a blast! And yes, I’m quit aware a lot of people live miserable lives and wish to take you with them! But thanks for the info….. I’ve driven OTR for 30 years! I’m quit aware of the miserable lives scenario…..

ROFLMAO…..

by RoachKiller

Yall are in the wrong neighborhood! Don’t yall live on the other side of the tracks? You know, down there in the slums of yuppy ville and lands of gentrification?

Anyhoot, just kicken back watching the friends of the pedo and the fake forensic computeroligist…..

Must be a Holliday week……

Anyhoot! Got plenty of wrapping to do! See ya!

Hey…..

by RoachKiller

I’m here, have been for a long time! Your having an issue you talk to me! If I don’t hear from you I’m guessing you’re fine and all is well!

Sorry to tell ya but unless you talk I don’t know your situation! Comprende’?

Don’t be…..

by RoachKiller

Laughing at me young lady! I’m not the one who was stupid enough to buy one those ford vega mustangs! You know, the ones that disintegrate on impact with anything…..

Believe me, I’ve seen many of them in pieces on the highway…..

Atleast we know natural selection is still a true thing…..

I come…..

by RoachKiller

To the conclusion these trucks are driven by midgets with bad backs while I’m away! I’m telling ya!

Ya know…..

by RoachKiller

I’m new to this company and I walked into the dc at the end of my shift to turn in paperwork. The boss lady said “ here, thanks for being part of the team, blah blah blah….” lol yes she said blah blah blah! Or was it, etc etc etc? 🙂

She handed me an envelope! I was like cool! Finished my business and got out of there! What I didn’t know was inside the envelope she handed me was a fat gift card to the local Kroger!

My jaw dropped and I was like how fucking cool is that? The 30 years I’ve been driving not one company I’ve ever worked for has given me shit except for cheap catalogue trinkets, jackets or cold wooden plaques that you had no idea you were getting! My 1 – 3 million accident free plaques just arrived one day…..

So to get this I was blown away! Never mind the bullshit with the unplugging of my lift 4 times and all that shit! not to mention that bizarre answer I got from that other driver “ he too is being targeted!” Which I still can’t figure out why he said that?

It was just unbelievable! That, that actually made me feel appreciated! Cus I know I have really been working my fucking ass off at this job! Learning all I can from whoever I can! Never giving up and definitely cussing out whoever it was that put the 1 box drop on the very bottom of the pallet!

I also know I’m working very hard to drop that shit, untrusting attitude I acquired working 23 years at Crete….. those twats are seriously fucked in the head! That’s a story for another time!

So with that said, merry Christmas and happy what fucking ever religion you believe in! Me I’m agnostic so unless you got godly proof I’ll just keep on keeping on!

Praise sweet baby Jesus….. oh I crack myself up!

You wanna talk…..

by RoachKiller

About some stupid shit? I asked another driver wtf was up with coming back and having my jack unplugged mid charge?

His exact reply was, “ I’m a marked man too?” Like wtf is that shit all about?

ROFLMAO! And no I am not on twitter…..

No wonder…..

by RoachKiller

Your god woke me up so early this morning! He wanted me to see all the new neighborhood hotties! Damn someone around here has definitely been upgrading!

Welp…..

by RoachKiller

Not a lot of damage from last nights storm! A few broken twigs, another broken limb on the tree in the front yard! ( so glad I topped the cherry tree earlier this year! It would have toppled for sure! )

No fence damage, no roof damage! ( I have all the lumber now to replace the fence just need some fucking time to do it! )

What I’m impressed with is the fact all 3 garbage cans are upright! When the storm woke me up last night. I was just sure they were blown to Kansas….

Anyhoot, I went to make an omelette for bfast and realized I have no hashbrowns or sausage! So see ya, off to the store I go…..

I am also seriously glad I have all my major electronics on a battery back up! I only have 2 clocks to reset! Yay!

Still have shit to go through from the truck…..