What Life on the road as a truck driver is really like!
by RoachKiller One of my radar sensors is out of whack. Or the way it went out, might even be a wiring issue! So I can’t turn on cruise control. So I’m stuck at 65 mph.
You, you can do 68 mph and I’m still faster than you? Dude that’s fucked up……
by RoachKiller Not only was my Mexican taco maker far too important to actually make my food!
Your geriatrics were in front of me in line! Oddly granny shit herself in line!
You people really need to take better care of your geezers!
Don’t worry, since I voiced my positive opinion about the border wall. The slackers seam to think that’s a reason to troll…. even though they are the ones who voted for Trump! Roflmao!
Anyhoot, I realize not all people are as shitty as you people are!
I would also like to mention, even though you’re in America, and you can’t speak English. I can work around that. I know I know Spanish French Portuguese German to get myself in serious trouble. But the one thing I can’t work with is being a dick or a bitch Cause you don’t understand what I’m saying.!
That’s all on you! I actually picked up at a warehouse on the Mexican border years ago. Where nobody at that warehouse spoke English. They weren’t about it. I wasn’t a dick about it. I walked across the way to the other warehouse where they had someone who spoke English. And bills are signed and away we went!
So if you send me no English, I’ll point at what I want. So there’s no need to be a cocksucker because you don’t understand what I’m fucking ordering…
I mean fajita plate is universal in every language, right?
by RoachKiller To grab some lunch! Smelled this peculiar smell! It’s like perfume mixed with rotting flesh! It’s a smell I usually only smell at cemeteries!
So I look around to see this!
Yup you guessed it! A golf course….. same thing as a cemetery except the rotting corpses are walking the course….
( don’t tell me I’m the only one who has ever noticed the unique smell every cemetery has! Literally the smell of decay and flower perfume….. )
by RoachKiller Ruuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnn!
by RoachKiller There is a giant wreck up ahead! I have spent the last hour stickering my daughter to the back of trailers and road signs stating,
“Mary mother of Jesus…”
Oh cmon, it’s fucking hilarious….
by RoachKiller To go princess? Or has your trainee not come back from begging drivers for money yet?
by RoachKiller To see one of your higher quality than me drivers with his feathers in a ruffle! My guess it was due to the fact I was here to pick up a load.
Can you believe the audacity of stupid people? I mean other than the fact I smiled at his batch of stupid. I could give 2 shits about him or what he is doing!
By no means would I ever get in my car and troll that poor pathetic pile of human fecal matter!
Now if I happened to drive by on my time off I most definitely would have thrown him the west coaster gangsta sign of www.roach.es!
Evan as a guitar player throwing that gang sign is still difficult! Especially the dot!
Anyhoot, time to roll and spend as much time just doing my thing. As me just doing my thing pisses people like you off!
Praise sweet baby Jesus! Amen!
Fyi it’s really fucking hot here. And after yesterday’s fly kills! I can definetly say I’m a professional fly hunter!
by RoachKiller When I heard it was 104 in Newark nj today! Oh you know the smell of fermenting shit has really got to be strong there today!
Omg, I just gagged a little more thinking about it again!
by RoachKiller How about you go get one of those high quality drivers you said you were going to replace me with. To do your bullshit local work!
Remember, “I don’t work hard enough!“ yet oddly I’m always at the top of the “ works to fucking hard “ list!
Or how about, “ you get off your fat fucking ass and do something?” Or is doing more than fucking pushing keyboard keys to taxing for you?
Oddly, I also don’t see you working 70+ hours a week for the last 23 years! Matter of fact, most of you lazy cunts have your coats on and ready to race for the door long before your end of shift!
So my suggestion would be for you people to do it! Cus I’m really fucking tired of fixing your fucking problems…..
by RoachKiller The rest of the story…..
Siri said it, I just used it…..
by RoachKiller Lovely lot lizard #1….
Can you say, Mel’s diner, pantyhose junction waitress?
Although for $20…..
by RoachKiller Being a 1%!
I recommend you stay down there at the bottom with the rest of the barrel! I hear there is much freedom that comes with great ignorance….
by RoachKiller After 3 hours of waiting. Not one truck moved! Not fucking one! So I decided to try the other truck stops! Fuck no, they were packed in like sardines!
So then I even went as far as looking for street parking! All of that within a 3 mile radius was packed! Even the illegal street parking was packed!
So then I remembered a shit hole truck stop about 5 miles away! Lo and behold they had 3! Count them 3 fucking spots available! With only 2 lot Lizards working the lot!
Jesus Christ, your home town sucks ass! Big time!
by RoachKiller Don’t you people have fucking jobs? Been sitting here 3 hours waiting for one of you fuckers to move!
Good thing I’m here for a reset and don’t have to leave in 7 hours to start my day…..
What really annoying are these cunts who unhook and take up 2 spots all night long…..
Supposably saving a spot for someone who never shows up…..
by RoachKiller They do not want to post pictures of my beautiful baby fresh grandchildren! So I will not! I will tell you they are fucking beautiful!
Well gotta go! See ya!
I’ll be roasting up some sirloin in there honor!
by RoachKiller Ready to roll or are yall just give each other hand kobs at the stop sign?
by RoachKiller The instigators went and flipped the script on me and now they’re playing the victims! It’s amazing how quickly you’re able to flip your bullshit stories……
I guess in your defense, though you do have plenty of time to overthink stupidity…..
by RoachKiller Baby B has been born! Mom and sons are doing well! Both weighed around 7.5 lbs!
They were concerned about baby B having to be taken out via cesarean section! Luckily both were delivered naturally!
Babies all have 10 fingers and toes, all chromosomes accounted for ( roflmao, that’s something you can’t say, huh? ) and unfortunately there was no Baby C as grandpa was hoping for!
With parents permission I will post a picture of William and Clark when available!
All hail RA!
Yea I see it! My 89 years young look is coming through……
by RoachKiller A grandpa as of one hour ago! Baby a has been hatched! We all await the hatching of baby B!
So upon this outcome, I can no longer use the word Gramps as a derogatory name for old people! So now I may only refer to them as geezers, geriatrics or old people. As I don’t want to confuse you into thinking, I’m talking about myself……
I would like to say congratulations to my beautiful daughter and her husband! I cannot wait to see some pictures of these two beautiful young lads.
And delusions of Granger are already dancing through my head as to how I can spoil these two little kids as only a grandpa can…..
by RoachKiller He had the wiggle of death long before he went over the bridge….
